I've had to laugh lately as I've begun to notice a progression in parenting practices from the first child to the third. The following may be a bit stereotypical and/or exaggerated, but most of these are taken from my own experience, having begun raising three kids and being a firstborn child myself . . .
Child #1 - Dropped binky is thouroughly washed off and sterilized - several times.
Child #2 - Dropped binky is rinsed off and put back into mouth
Child #3 - Dropped binky is put back into mouth after large dirt particles may or may not have been flicked off
Child #1 - Swooped up at the first whimper
Child #2 - Picked up after crying for several minutes
Child #3 - "There's a baby crying?"
Child #1 - Free-range meat, organic tofu burgers, made-from-scratch whole-grain cereal, a truckload of fruits and veggies
Child #2 - Turkey dogs, some fruits and veggies (mostly banana), all-natural cereal bars
Child #3 - Anything edible that isn't too far expired
Child #1 - Baby book meticulously filled out through the first five years
Child #2 - Baby book sporadically filled out through the first year
Child #3 - Should we have gotten a baby book?
Child #1 - Picture taken each month, on the same day, at the same time, in the same pose
Child #2 - Picture taken 8 out of the first 12 months
Child #3 - All 4 pictures taken during the first year are on an older sibling's camera
Child #1 - Rigorously and consistently disciplined for every infraction
Child #2 - Able to manipulate way out of some punishments
Child #3 - Gets away with murder
Child #1 - Brand new: Gap, Old Navy, Gymboree
Child #2 - Used: Gap, Old Navy, Gymboree
Child #3 - Garage sale leftovers
Child #1 - Naptime at exactly 9:30am, 1:00pm daily
Child #2 - Naptime sometime in the morning and another sometime in the afternoon on most days
Child #3 - Brief snatches of a nap in the car while running errands
Child #1 - Read to at least 20 minutes a day
Child #2 - Read to when Child #1 wants to be read to
Child #3 - Occasionally overhears book being read to Child #1 & #2
Child #1 - We have all the answers
Child #2 - We have some of the answers
Child #3 - We don't even know the right questions to ask!
I can't think of any more at the moment. But I know what you're thinking right now is, it's a good thing we only have THREE . . .
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Monday, September 25, 2006
Wrighteous Living
This week has flown by. There's way too much to write about, so I'll just leave it at a few highlights, starting with last weekend.
Here's to . . .
. . . a wonderful evening with new friends. At 6:00 we were practically strangers, and 6 hours later it seemed like we'd known each other for years.
. . . Cubbies! Rachel is in her second year and absolutely loves it. Last week she brought home a work of art she called "fireworks": a blob of glue on a piece of black paper, covered with gold glitter.
. . . Applesauce. Applesauce. Applesauce. My goal is to freeze enough for our family for an entire year, since the kids won't eat anything but the stuff I make (I use Cortland apples, so it always turns out bright pink!). I'm about halfway there . . .
. . . dinner at El Camino with a good friend - a rare treat!
. . . scrapbook parties where very little scrapbooking actually takes place. :-)
. . . 2 strollers, 3 hours, 4 miles, 200 doorhangers, 1 church plant launching next Sunday!
. . . date nights with free babysitting! We had dinner at Applebee's while Jason & Jodi got puked on by Zekers.
. . . a fridge so full of leftovers from the previous week that I went 5 days without having to fix dinner. You can't beat that!
. . . having a 4-yr-old shopping buddy who has turned out to be a surprising conversationalist.
. . . discovering that Danny & I are never immune to "The Crazy Cycle" (see Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs) - a humbling realization.
. . . not taking one picture for over a week - the first time this has happened in about 5 years.
Here's to . . .
. . . a wonderful evening with new friends. At 6:00 we were practically strangers, and 6 hours later it seemed like we'd known each other for years.
. . . Cubbies! Rachel is in her second year and absolutely loves it. Last week she brought home a work of art she called "fireworks": a blob of glue on a piece of black paper, covered with gold glitter.
. . . Applesauce. Applesauce. Applesauce. My goal is to freeze enough for our family for an entire year, since the kids won't eat anything but the stuff I make (I use Cortland apples, so it always turns out bright pink!). I'm about halfway there . . .
. . . dinner at El Camino with a good friend - a rare treat!
. . . scrapbook parties where very little scrapbooking actually takes place. :-)
. . . 2 strollers, 3 hours, 4 miles, 200 doorhangers, 1 church plant launching next Sunday!
. . . date nights with free babysitting! We had dinner at Applebee's while Jason & Jodi got puked on by Zekers.
. . . a fridge so full of leftovers from the previous week that I went 5 days without having to fix dinner. You can't beat that!
. . . having a 4-yr-old shopping buddy who has turned out to be a surprising conversationalist.
. . . discovering that Danny & I are never immune to "The Crazy Cycle" (see Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs) - a humbling realization.
. . . not taking one picture for over a week - the first time this has happened in about 5 years.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Better With Age
Well, here I am - up to my eyeballs in laundry and the house is trashed from top to bottom. In a rare moment of reckless abandon, I'm indulging in something I love - writing - while throwing Everything Else to the wind. What a rush. (I know, I need to get out more)
I've been thinking quite a bit lately about aging. Maybe it's because of the silver-gray hair I occasionally pluck from my head. Or maybe it's the tiny crow's feet that have begun to accompany every smile. The fact is, no matter how young I look or feel, I am slowly, steadily growing older, as is every other human being on earth. And I'm not quite sure how I feel about this.
On the one hand, I'm in the prime of my life: old enough to be taken (somewhat) seriously, but not yet considered "old" - by most. On the other hand, I was 20 about one minute ago, and now, in just 8 short years, I will be 40! God has allowed me to experience so much already: college life, cross-country travels, 3 months overseas, having sex (Don't even pretend you've never prayed for Christ's return to be delayed until you got to experience that!), being married, giving birth, parenting. I don't think I dread dying as much as I dread growing old.
Why is that????
Perhaps it's because youth is so celebrated in our society and I'm terrified that the time is fast-approaching when I will be considered outdated and irrelevant. Or perhaps it's my own lack of preparedness. Every birthday kind of "sneaks up" on me and I'm rarely at a point where I feel ready to be that age.
What if - and this is purely conjecture - what if I began now to think about the kind of person I desire to be at age 50? What if I embraced the thought of growing older, because with age comes wisdom, maturity (hopefully!), the opportunity to invest in younger women, and a more intimate walk with my Savior? What if I give less attention to things that truly don't matter in the long run, and focus more on what's eternal?
I wish I had thought about this at age 20. I wish that, in addition to planning out how my imaginary wedding would play out and what kind of family I wanted to have and the career I would be pursuing, I had also planned toward the kind of person I would be - regardless of how my circumstances unfolded.
Not that I'm looking forward to the litany of health issues that often plagues the elderly, or the gradual deterioration of my physical body. But I do look with anticipation toward becoming wiser and more like Christ - and that much closer to going home. "Wisdom is with aged men, With long life is understanding" (Job 12:12). What I wouldn't give sometimes for a little more understanding!
I read about Sarah, Anna and Timothy's grandmother in Scripture - how God used them in their old age. And I think about the older people who have had a much greater influence on my life than they will ever know: people who have prayed and encouraged me and offered godly wisdom through tumultuous times of my life. The fact is, I wouldn't have made it this far without the counsel of those older, and far wiser, than myself.
I hope this doesn't sound too morbid. I guess what I'm saying is that instead of fighting or denying the aging process, I want to run the WHOLE race so as to bring glory to God - whether I'm 32 or 62. And I want to start thinking about the kind of person, the kind of disciple, I want to be when I reach middle age and then the "sunset years."
I've been thinking quite a bit lately about aging. Maybe it's because of the silver-gray hair I occasionally pluck from my head. Or maybe it's the tiny crow's feet that have begun to accompany every smile. The fact is, no matter how young I look or feel, I am slowly, steadily growing older, as is every other human being on earth. And I'm not quite sure how I feel about this.
On the one hand, I'm in the prime of my life: old enough to be taken (somewhat) seriously, but not yet considered "old" - by most. On the other hand, I was 20 about one minute ago, and now, in just 8 short years, I will be 40! God has allowed me to experience so much already: college life, cross-country travels, 3 months overseas, having sex (Don't even pretend you've never prayed for Christ's return to be delayed until you got to experience that!), being married, giving birth, parenting. I don't think I dread dying as much as I dread growing old.
Why is that????
Perhaps it's because youth is so celebrated in our society and I'm terrified that the time is fast-approaching when I will be considered outdated and irrelevant. Or perhaps it's my own lack of preparedness. Every birthday kind of "sneaks up" on me and I'm rarely at a point where I feel ready to be that age.
What if - and this is purely conjecture - what if I began now to think about the kind of person I desire to be at age 50? What if I embraced the thought of growing older, because with age comes wisdom, maturity (hopefully!), the opportunity to invest in younger women, and a more intimate walk with my Savior? What if I give less attention to things that truly don't matter in the long run, and focus more on what's eternal?
I wish I had thought about this at age 20. I wish that, in addition to planning out how my imaginary wedding would play out and what kind of family I wanted to have and the career I would be pursuing, I had also planned toward the kind of person I would be - regardless of how my circumstances unfolded.
Not that I'm looking forward to the litany of health issues that often plagues the elderly, or the gradual deterioration of my physical body. But I do look with anticipation toward becoming wiser and more like Christ - and that much closer to going home. "Wisdom is with aged men, With long life is understanding" (Job 12:12). What I wouldn't give sometimes for a little more understanding!
I read about Sarah, Anna and Timothy's grandmother in Scripture - how God used them in their old age. And I think about the older people who have had a much greater influence on my life than they will ever know: people who have prayed and encouraged me and offered godly wisdom through tumultuous times of my life. The fact is, I wouldn't have made it this far without the counsel of those older, and far wiser, than myself.
I hope this doesn't sound too morbid. I guess what I'm saying is that instead of fighting or denying the aging process, I want to run the WHOLE race so as to bring glory to God - whether I'm 32 or 62. And I want to start thinking about the kind of person, the kind of disciple, I want to be when I reach middle age and then the "sunset years."
Monday, September 18, 2006
Say What?
2 random happenings from the past couple of weeks . . .
We were in Wal-Mart (our second home) several days ago, waiting outside the restroom for Rachel. Zekers patiently sat in the blue toddler seat attached to the cart, and Kari Bou very impatiently squirmed in the "basket" portion of the cart for smaller children. A kind-looking older woman came out of the restroom, saw us, and smiling broadly, came over to chat for a minute.
I've found that whenever you venture out in public with three kids ages 4 & under, you get lots of comments - everything from nice ("Oh, aren't they adorable?") to sympathetic ("You certainly have your hands full!") to downright rude ("There are ways to prevent that, you know.") This woman seemed like the nice type.
"What a big, strapping boy you have there!" She exclaimed. "My, he looks strong."
I started to smile and respond, when I realized she wasn't looking at my son, but at my DAUGHTER. Now, Karis had her one-year checkup several weeks ago and weighed in at a whopping 19.5 lbs - enough to put her in the 25th percentile for weight. She's in the 85th percentile for height, however, which makes her seem even thinner. She has very little hair and was wearing a brown shirt that day, so I could sort of understand the mistake, but come on - Zekers was sitting right there and is bigger and broader in every way! The last thing any mother wants to hear is how masculine her sweet, delicate little girl looks.
I was about to explain that Karis was, in fact, a girl, but I couldn't get a word in edgewise. "My, you're going to make a fine football player someday - probably a linebacker!" She continued. At this point I simply smiled politely and prayed fervently that Rach would come out of the bathroom.
And when she did come out (of the girls' restroom), what was this nice lady's comment? "Where in the world does he get his beautiful curly hair?" I must confess, I grabbed the cart and bolted, afraid that in five more minutes she'd have discovered Zekers and turned him into a ballerina.
Later in the week, we were again out running errands - this time waiting at a red light. Rach & Zekers like to talk to each other and to me while we're driving, so often when I'm sitting at a light I'll turn around so I can see them. On this particular occasion, they looked so adorable sitting there like three little ducks in a row, that I couldn't help exclaiming, apparently very loudly, "You guys are SO cute!"
Almost at the same moment, I glanced to the side, and saw that right next to us sat a red pickup truck with 2 young-ish men in the front seat. The weather being somewhat warm, we both had our windows open. I have never seen two heads snap so fast to look in my direction. And I won't soon forget the expression on their faces - a mixture of surprise and delight. At once, it ocurred to me that our windows are all tinted, and the back seat windows were, in fact, closed. There was absolutely no evidence to indicate I had been talking to anyone other than them! After making matters worse by inadvertently saying, "Aw, crap", the only other option that came into my head was to turn around and speak to the kids very loudly, making it obvious I had been talking to children in the back seat. I have never experienced such a torturously long wait at a red light.
I've decided from now on I'm having my groceries delivered.
We were in Wal-Mart (our second home) several days ago, waiting outside the restroom for Rachel. Zekers patiently sat in the blue toddler seat attached to the cart, and Kari Bou very impatiently squirmed in the "basket" portion of the cart for smaller children. A kind-looking older woman came out of the restroom, saw us, and smiling broadly, came over to chat for a minute.
I've found that whenever you venture out in public with three kids ages 4 & under, you get lots of comments - everything from nice ("Oh, aren't they adorable?") to sympathetic ("You certainly have your hands full!") to downright rude ("There are ways to prevent that, you know.") This woman seemed like the nice type.
"What a big, strapping boy you have there!" She exclaimed. "My, he looks strong."
I started to smile and respond, when I realized she wasn't looking at my son, but at my DAUGHTER. Now, Karis had her one-year checkup several weeks ago and weighed in at a whopping 19.5 lbs - enough to put her in the 25th percentile for weight. She's in the 85th percentile for height, however, which makes her seem even thinner. She has very little hair and was wearing a brown shirt that day, so I could sort of understand the mistake, but come on - Zekers was sitting right there and is bigger and broader in every way! The last thing any mother wants to hear is how masculine her sweet, delicate little girl looks.
I was about to explain that Karis was, in fact, a girl, but I couldn't get a word in edgewise. "My, you're going to make a fine football player someday - probably a linebacker!" She continued. At this point I simply smiled politely and prayed fervently that Rach would come out of the bathroom.
And when she did come out (of the girls' restroom), what was this nice lady's comment? "Where in the world does he get his beautiful curly hair?" I must confess, I grabbed the cart and bolted, afraid that in five more minutes she'd have discovered Zekers and turned him into a ballerina.
Later in the week, we were again out running errands - this time waiting at a red light. Rach & Zekers like to talk to each other and to me while we're driving, so often when I'm sitting at a light I'll turn around so I can see them. On this particular occasion, they looked so adorable sitting there like three little ducks in a row, that I couldn't help exclaiming, apparently very loudly, "You guys are SO cute!"
Almost at the same moment, I glanced to the side, and saw that right next to us sat a red pickup truck with 2 young-ish men in the front seat. The weather being somewhat warm, we both had our windows open. I have never seen two heads snap so fast to look in my direction. And I won't soon forget the expression on their faces - a mixture of surprise and delight. At once, it ocurred to me that our windows are all tinted, and the back seat windows were, in fact, closed. There was absolutely no evidence to indicate I had been talking to anyone other than them! After making matters worse by inadvertently saying, "Aw, crap", the only other option that came into my head was to turn around and speak to the kids very loudly, making it obvious I had been talking to children in the back seat. I have never experienced such a torturously long wait at a red light.
I've decided from now on I'm having my groceries delivered.
Fun Times on the Ferris Wheel
Going through some old pix the other day, and sorting through some newer ones, I came across these two gems and realized I just can't keep this to myself. It's almost spooky.
Fair 2005
Fair 2006
I guess we can look at this as A) an annual waste of $4 or B) a new annual tradition. Personally, I vote for C) All of the above.
Fair 2005
Fair 2006I guess we can look at this as A) an annual waste of $4 or B) a new annual tradition. Personally, I vote for C) All of the above.
Friday, September 15, 2006
When Contentment Isn't Good
Our church has begun an in-depth study of the book of Joshua. A discussion during life group on Tuesday and some of the reading for next week brought out an interesting concept from the first chapter of the book that has really stayed with me.
The Bible teaches that contentment equals much greater gain than earthly possessions. Satisfaction in Christ is key in the Christian life. However, there is one thing I should never be satisfied with, and that is - ME.
I'm not talking about my looks or personality or gifts & abilities. I'm thinking more of my relationship with Christ. I should be in a continual process of refinement, pressing on to look more like my Savior until the day I enter eternal rest with Him. He Himself says, "Be perfect, even as your Heavenly Father is perfect" (Mt. 5:48). Paul speaks of "pressing on toward the goal" in Philippians 3:14. To use his analogy, a good runner is not content to complete part of the race and then take a nap on the track. She stays focused on the finish line until she crosses it. Therefore I must spend the rest of my life in pursuit of this goal - becoming more like Christ, and storing up eternal rewards vs. earthly ones.
"Godliness with contentment is great gain" (I Tim. 6:6), but contentment with where I am spiritually quickly becomes complacency.
The Bible teaches that contentment equals much greater gain than earthly possessions. Satisfaction in Christ is key in the Christian life. However, there is one thing I should never be satisfied with, and that is - ME.
I'm not talking about my looks or personality or gifts & abilities. I'm thinking more of my relationship with Christ. I should be in a continual process of refinement, pressing on to look more like my Savior until the day I enter eternal rest with Him. He Himself says, "Be perfect, even as your Heavenly Father is perfect" (Mt. 5:48). Paul speaks of "pressing on toward the goal" in Philippians 3:14. To use his analogy, a good runner is not content to complete part of the race and then take a nap on the track. She stays focused on the finish line until she crosses it. Therefore I must spend the rest of my life in pursuit of this goal - becoming more like Christ, and storing up eternal rewards vs. earthly ones.
"Godliness with contentment is great gain" (I Tim. 6:6), but contentment with where I am spiritually quickly becomes complacency.
Pearly Whites
Rachel had her second annual trip to the dentist on Thursday, and I'm proud to say, she did great!
Melody, the dental hygienist, had a way of putting her right at ease while she counted and cleaned her teeth, and Dr. Fourman congratulated her on no longer sucking her thumb. (After last year's appointment, we came straight home and duct taped mittens to both her hands every night for 2 weeks. It was so sad, but she knew it had to be done. She even reminded us to get the mittens on nights we forgot.) Then she received a "Disney Princess" flosser and a new pink toothbrush - and a sticker of Gloria the hippo from Madagascar. Does it get any better than that?
I, on the other hand, didn't fare quite so well. No princess flosser or sticker for me. But I do get to go back for another appointment next week!
Melody, the dental hygienist, had a way of putting her right at ease while she counted and cleaned her teeth, and Dr. Fourman congratulated her on no longer sucking her thumb. (After last year's appointment, we came straight home and duct taped mittens to both her hands every night for 2 weeks. It was so sad, but she knew it had to be done. She even reminded us to get the mittens on nights we forgot.) Then she received a "Disney Princess" flosser and a new pink toothbrush - and a sticker of Gloria the hippo from Madagascar. Does it get any better than that?
I, on the other hand, didn't fare quite so well. No princess flosser or sticker for me. But I do get to go back for another appointment next week!
Thursday, September 07, 2006
Little Bou
It didn't hit me until a couple of months ago - I unwittingly named my darling baby girl after my husband's fantasy basketball team! Aaaagggghhhh! Karis' name was agreed upon about one week prior to her birth. We knew she was going to be a boy - everyone thought so - because of the way I carried her (see pregnancy myth #458): super low, out front, and I was HUGE. But, just for fun, we thought maybe we should have a girl's name handy. Enter "Karis Hope."
After the dozens of nicknames we came up with for Rach & Zekers, Karis' list has been pretty short. She started out as "Baby Love" and slowly became "Kari Bou" (with variations such as "Baby Bou", and "Little Bou Bou"). In vain, I attempted to change the nickname to "Kari Lou." No dice. She simply IS Kari Bou.
FYI, Danny's team is the Carson City Caribou, so he's always been after me to name a boy "Carson" and a girl "Cari", with a middle name of "Bou." I, of course, said what any loving wife would say: "Over my dead body." And here we are. Things have degenerated to the point that I can't think of her as anything else.
While we're on the topic: my little Bou turned one year old last Tuesday; we had her party on Saturday. I feel I must mention it was the ONE day all week that was actually cold, windy and rained most of the afternoon and evening. We did manage to hang out and open gifts before it really started coming down, although she was forced to finish mauling her cake indoors. In spite of the schitzophrenic weather and realizing at the last minute that we had about 20 less lawn chairs than we needed, it was a fun day with family and friends. In honor of Karis being out in the open for one year, I thought I'd jot down several adjectives that describe her most accurately. Here we go:
Determined - When she decides she wants to do something, watch out! She WILL figure out how to do it.
Hungry - Have you ever seen this kid eat? At times she out-eats both her older siblings. And there's nothing she won't try, including sand, dirt, and wood chips (with the exception of certain vegetables, of course). There's no other way to say it - she's a pig.
Stinky - She can also poop like nobody's business. The last three days in a row, she's gone to pooping after breakfast, waiting for me to change her, and then going for round two almost immediately.
Fun - She's one of the happiest (usually) babies I've ever been around. It's way too easy to get a belly laugh from her; in fact, sometimes she comes up to one of us and just starts laughing because she knows it will make us laugh. She's full of personality and life; if anyone in the house is having fun, she has to plop herself right down in the middle of it. What a clown. Cute - see pictures
Tough - She's had no choice but to learn to fight back . . .
Accident-prone - Goes with #1, I guess. She walks around with more bruises and cuts even than Zekers used to. Yesterday she somehow managed to fall face-forward while in her high chair, bringing the entire chair down on top of herself. That one resulted in a pretty good shiner. The child simply refuses to sit still.
Sweet - Just spend five minutes with her, and you'll see what I mean.
Loud - Ditto
Mamma's Girl - In my opinion, this is by far her best quality. I love that she likes to lay her head on my shoulder and that she wants to snuggle after every "injury" and that her first word was "Mama." She loves her Daddy too, of course, and has a special smile she reserves just for him.
Happy Birthday, Kari Bou! I love you!
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