"Here is the core reason we wrote this book: to let you know that the healing for your feminine heart is available, and to help you find that healing" (p. 96).
Of all the topics covered in the pages of Captivating, I came away most impressed, and most disappointed, by John's & Stasi's coverage of this one. Let me explain.
The Eldredges share numerous helpful insights on woundedness and restoration - both theoretical and practical. They discuss the importance of grieving - letting the tears flow over past hurts and admitting that the pain matters. They highlight the necessity of forgiving those who have wounded us, saying, "Forgiveness is a choice. It is not a feeling . . . It is an act of the will" (p. 103) They state that we must turn to Christ for healing, instead of to "our self-redemptive strategies" (p. 103).
Stasi gives a stirring account of the restoration that occurred between her and her mother. After a lifetime of feeling that she was always letting her mother down, she says God revealed to her that "the way my mother made me feel was the same way I made her feel. A disappoinment. An embarrassment. A failure" (p. 173). Stasi relates that she was "compelled by God to see her as soon as possible." She shared her true heart with her mother, asking for her forgiveness. And all the barriers came down. Stasi was able to spend one wonderful year with her mother before multiple myeloma finally claimed her life. My own tears flowed as I read her story.
I Corinthians 15 lays out the central healing message: "Christ died for our sins, according to the Scriptures. He was buried, He was raised on the third day, according to the Scriptures . . . "
What a wonderful hope for healing! And what a disappointment that John & Stasi Eldredge dance all around the central theme of the gospel, but never really share some of its core tenets - sin and repentance. The bottom line: they preach a feel-good gospel, a gospel of healing and comfort and self-esteem; but they fail to mention that the ONLY road to true healing lies in acknowleging my sin before a holy and righteous God and turning from it to follow Him. The closest the authors come to laying out the gospel is as follows:
Jesus . . . came, he died, he rose again for us. He was given all authority in heaven and on earth for us (pp.195-6).But without an understanding of our sin, Christ's death and resurrection are . . . pointless.
Check out Matthew 9:1-8. Instead of immediately healing the paralytic, Jesus says, "Your sins are forgiven." Then, to authenticate His message, He heals the man's physical condition. Take a look at John 4 - Jesus' encounter with the Samaritan woman. To her surprise, He offers her not well water (the temporary solution to a physical thirst), but living water (eternal life).
What John & Stasi share about healing isn't untrue. Christ does offer healing for the brokenhearted. But this statement doesn't go far enough. Emotional healing is a fringe benefit that comes from a life submitted to the Savior! Our purpose in life is not to find healing for ourselves but to glorify our Lord.
I'm not downplaying the importance of recovering from emotional scars. Each of us has suffered to varying degrees as a result of the finite nature of our parents, friends and others. But the primary healing Christ offers is healing of the spirit, found in acknowleging our guilt and submitting to His Lordship. He offers so much more than a temporary fix - He freely gives us eternal life, through His atoning sacrifice.
Coming Soon: The Bottom Line
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