The Princess and the Bulldozer

Since their birthdays are so close together, I thought I'd devote a few paragraphs to each of my girls . . .

Rachel Nicole - August 24, 2002

Within the last 2 weeks my little girl turned six, learned to ride a bike (no training wheels!) and started first grade.

I'll write more about the school thing later, when I'm not so emotional about it. She absolutely loves it, though.

With 3 birthdays in the late summer/fall, we decided they can each have a party every other year, starting when they're 5, so Rach didn't have one this year. She did get to see a movie (Kit Kittredge) and pick what she wanted for breakfast, lunch and dinner.


Some words that come to mind when I think of Rachel are:







talkative

vivacious

mother hen

princess

drama queen

affectionate

bright

sensitive

colorful

imaginative

answer-girl


She loves barbies and sleepovers and going new places. Her favorite colors are pink and purple and she's always begging me to let her wear a dress. She picks bouquets of wildflowers (I think most of them are actually weeds) nearly every day from our yard, and loves making cards and drawing pictures for people she loves. She likes to help around the house and with her baby brother, unless it means having anything to do with a dirty diaper.

Her birthday always takes me back to a time of many firsts:

We had just moved here and started at the church.

We bought our first house.

We gave birth to our first baby.

I'll never forget the excitement and anticipation that led up to her grand entrance. Danny and I laid in bed at night, as all expecting parents do, feeling her kick, wondering what kind of personality she'd have, what she'd look like, what it would feel like to hold her and rock her and gaze at her while she slept.

And now she's six, and we know she'll always be our little curly-headed lunatic. I love you, Shrumshine!



Karis Hope - August 29, 2005

And now, for the bulldozer . . .

In utero, Karis was a squirmer. ALL the time. ALL night long. I should have known then that this was fair warning of the little fireball we were about to bring home. Almost all the way through, everyone thought she was going to be a boy, including Danny and me. When the doctor announced, "You have a little girl!" I thought I had heard him wrong (but of course now I'm glad I didn't!).

She's an interesting mix: part tomboy and part nurturing little sweetheart. She loves Dora and Care Bears and Polly Pockets. She loves to pummel her older siblings, throw small objects at people, destroy things, scream like a banshee, and squeeze her baby brother's face.

Her prayers always go something like this: "Dear Jesus, thank you for God, thank you for Jesus, thank you for everyone in this house. Amen."



Her favorite things to say lately:

"What smells?" and "diarrhea." (most recently said in description of a plate of fried chicken) She will adamantly tell you that she is "not a little girl. I'm a little WOMAN." She also insists daily that I put her hair into ONE ponytail in the back - not 2 on the sides. If she doesn't get her wish, she cries brokenheartedly.

Recent escapades include:

setting off the emergency alarm after church (the narthex cleared in record time!)

smashing three trays-worth of cut-out cookies Rachel and I were getting ready to put into the oven

licking all the frosting off three of the cookies (they were for school for Rachel's birthday)

biting the lower lip of a little friend because "he took my food and wouldn't share"

helping herself to several pieces of bubble gum and the hurriedly shoving them into her pocket when I looked her way


But as much as she acts like a human bulldozer, she can also be so sweet and affectionate. She loves to take my face in both hands and kiss me on each cheek at night. And she's a champion snuggler. She's sort of like what I imagine the ocean can be - stormy and tumultuous at some times, but beautiful and gentle at others. I love you, Kari Bou!

Fair Highlights

You know you're officially from our county when, for 9 days every August, the GREAT COUNTY FAIR becomes your life. It's hard not to take part in the festivities when the fair almost literally comes to our doorstep. Since we live just a few blocks from the county fairgrounds, our street (and sometimes our yard) becomes a parking lot for fairgoers from 9am - midnight for the week.

Highlights of the week included: animal barns; dirt; dog shows; Zekers having a meltdown after being stepped on by a pig; petting a tiny baby goat; more dirt; beautiful weather; the Dragon Wagon; $1 corn dogs & sno cones; large and lumpy gourds; spandex-clad goats; and feet so dirty you could write on the bottom of them with a wet Q-tip. Oh, and did I mention dirt?? Well, we must have loved the dirt because one or more members of our family visited the fair every day but one!

And now for some pictures to commemorate the week:


Two skeptics checking each other out. We had fun going to the fair with "Grandma & Grandpa Gibbons" on opening night.


"Goat speedos".


Ike let Malachi spend a few minutes with his pig. Malachi was thrilled.


Rachel and Zekers with Chloe's pig, right before he crushed Zekers' foot (you would have thought so, anyway, judging by the amount of tears that were shed)


Kari Bou was a bit excited about the sno cones.


So was Zeke, who did manage, eventually, to get some in his mouth.


Petting Tanner's horse


When we needed a rest, we took the kiddos to the playhouse display. There was even a bunk bed inside.


Malachi in the Swine Barn


Making a new friend


Grandma, Aunt Hannah, Esther and Luke spent the morning and afternoon with us at the fair on Monday.


The kiddie ferris wheel


Dizzy Dragons - one of Zekers' faves, and the only ride Aunt Hannah got to go on all day. Maybe next year. . .


Rachel got to meet her first mime! She wasn't quite sure what to think; she had no idea it was possible for a person to go without talking.


The Dragon Wagon!!! Three little words that fill the hearts of our muchkins with unspeakable joy. Rach started the trend of raising her hands up; Zekers followed suit; and Karis, not to be outdone by her older siblings, stuck hers high in the air, screaming in delight the whole way.


Mommy and Zekers at the top of the Ferris Wheel. When we stopped at the very top, I had to do something to keep myself from thinking about how high up we were. An appropriate caption might be: "Terror masked by a smile" The worst part was, they wouldn't let all three kids onto the FW with me, and Danny flatly refused to ride it, so I had to go on it TWICE. And we ended up going again on the last day. I'm not going to miss that part of the fair.


View from the Ferris Wheel at night



View from the Ferris Wheel in the afternoon


How we all felt at the end of the week

The Proverbs 32 Woman

I've referred to feeling like this woman in a couple of previous posts. So here she is, folks, the infamous Proverbs 32 Woman, evil twin and polar opposite of the Proverbs 31 Woman. (The actual Proverbs passage is in blue).


An excellent wife, who can find? For her worth is far above jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.

A below-average wife, anyone can find, for she is a-dime-a-dozen. The heart of her husband quakes in fear of her mood swings, and she offers him very little. When he expresses interest in her, she rolls her eyes in annoyance and asks him for a Tylenol. She belittles, nags and manipulates him every chance she gets.

She looks for wool and flax, and works with her hands in delight. She is like merchant ships; she brings her food from afar.

She knows she needs to clean the house - and the kids - but she throws up her hands in despair. She knows she needs to comb through ads and clip coupons to save money on groceries, but she puts it off until the last minute and ends up ordering pizza for dinner instead.

She rises also while it is still night, and gives food to her household, and portions to her maidens.

She has every intention of rising before the sun, but hits the "snooze" button on the alarm clock 14 times and is finally awakened by her children using her hips as a springboard. She drags herself out of bed and gives portions of pop-tarts to her household, wishing she had maidens to help.

She considers a field and buys it; from her earnings she plants a vineyard.

She tries to think of ways to bring a little extra income to the family; but gives up when she realizes that there aren't many businesses looking to hire a "professional booty-wiper" or "expert hollerer".

She girds herself with strength, and makes her arms strong.

She feels worn out, like a tattered dish rag. Her arms are weak because the only thing she's had a chance to eat since breakfast are the discarded crusts from her kids' peanut butter sandwiches.

She senses that her gain is good. Her lamp does not go out at night.

She senses that her day has been totally unproductive; and she's so depressed that the light from her TV does not go out until late at night.

She stretches out her hands to the distaff, and her hands grasp the spindle.

She stretches out her hands to the Vivarin, and her hands grasp her 6th cup of coffee.

She extends her hand to the poor, and she stretches out her hands to the needy. She is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

She finds the poor and the needy and asks them for help. She misses all the good sales on winter coats and decides her kids will just have to wear the ones from last year - their arms don't stick that far out of the sleeves.

She makes coverings for herself. Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

She is lucky to find enough clean clothes to wear for the day. She is clothed in T-shirts and sweat pants.

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sits among the elders of the land.

Her husband is known everywhere he goes because people feel sorry for him.

She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies belts to the tradesmen.

The only linen she possesses is a nightgown she received at a bridal shower about 100 years ago, now buried in the back of the closet. She spends way too much time on e-bay trying to sell things to, and buy things from, merchants.

Strength and dignity are her clothing, and she smiles at the future.

PMS and psychosis are her clothing, and the thought of facing the future sends her into a meltdown.

She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.

She opens her mouth to scream at her children, and hurtful words are on her tongue.

She looks well to the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.

She looks on helplessly as her household becomes a disaster area; as soon as the kids are down for their naps, she crashes on the sofa and helps herself to a large bowl of the ice cream she's been craving all day. She spends the rest of the afternoon online.

Her children rise up and bless her; her husband also, and he praises her saying: "Many daughters have done nobly, but you excel them all."

Her children rise up and run from her, and so does her husband, saying, "Many women scare the living daylights out of me, but you surpass them all!"

Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

Charm is long gone and beauty is a thing of the past; and the woman who lives in fear and self-loathing, she shall be paranoid.

Give her the product of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates.

Give her the fruit of her inefficiency, and the guilt from her works will haunt her continually.


I thank God daily that, while I often manifest aspects of the "Proverbs 32 Woman", He alone gives grace to produce a good work in me and to help me become ever more like the Proverbs 31 Woman. O Lord, You can do anything!!

Pool Antics

On Friday, August 15, we bid a sad farewell to our beloved friend, the city pool. I guess it would be more accurate to say that the kids were sad to say good-bye to the pool. I've pretty much heaved a sigh of relief with every towel and bathing suit I've washed and stashed away for next year.

The routine went something like this: once or twice a week we ate lunch at 11, loaded the van, slathered everyone with lotion, put our suits on and drove to the pool around noon. Most days we headed home around 2:30-3:00, so some of the kiddos could nap. Rach and Zekers usually ran over to the "big pool" while Karis, Malachi and I hung out in the kiddie pool. About halfway through the summer, things got a little more complicated when Karis fell in love with the water slide. I spent most of the time in the water or on the concrete near the slide, holding Malachi, who, for some reason, always seemed totally offended that we would even consider putting him in a baby floatie.

I'm not going to lie to you: it was a lot of work. bnvg xxxxxxxc,lll, ¬,zz,. (Malachi is bent on helping me write this paragraph) But it was well worth the trouble. I enjoyed spending time with friends at the pool - as much as it's possible to do while keeping an eagle eye on a 9-month-old - and it was a great way to get the kids outside during really hot days. AND it came with the added bonus of actually wearing them out so they slept really well and took longer naps than usual. The summer pass was definitely really cheap for the amount of pool time we got out of it.

And I'm hopeful that from here on out, trips to the pool will become progressively less work as the kiddos grow and become more independent.

I just had to share some of the pictures I took throughout the summer, most of them snapshots of Karis. She's usually either making me laugh or making me blow a gasket - there's not much middle ground with her. In these pictures she was making me laugh.

She loved to chat it up with the lifeguards - especially Ty, who, I think, wasn't quite sure what to think of the animated little squirt in the baggy orange bathing suit. In these first 2 shots, she's talking to him quite excitedly and he's patiently trying to seem interested, although I could tell he had no idea what she was talking about! At one point she sat down next to him on the edge of the pool for a few minutes and kept on talking. Ty and Marissa won the prize for "favorite lifeguard" this summer.





I guess all that talking wore her out. I could always tell when it was about time to pack up and go home!




On our last visit to the pool, the weather was a little cooler, so they all spent most of the afternoon playing with balls, buckets and mermaid dolls on the concrete.




Watching Karis come down the water slide was a hoot. She loved it so much, she'd sing a little song every time she came down, with a huge smile on her face.




A close-up of my little beach baby




This was Marissa's last year at the pool. We'll miss you, Marissa!

Your Consolations Delight My Soul

I just wanted to share something with you that encouraged my heart today . . .


If the LORD had not been my help, my soul would soon have dwelt in the abode of silence.
If I should say, "My foot has slipped," Your lovingkindness, O Lord, will hold me up.
When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul. (Psalm 94:17-19)



My soul, wait in silence for God only, for my hope is from Him . . . Trust in Him at all times . . . Pour out your heart before Him; God is a refuge for us. (Psalm 62:5,8)

Poop

I was washing up a few dishes after breakfast this morning, and looked over to see Malachi fussing and fidgeting around in his high chair. Knowing that in about 10 seconds his fussing would turn into yelling, I went over and took him out - and was rewarded by huge smiles. I sort of danced with him into the living room, bouncing him on my hip, as this makes him smile even more, and I am a total sucker for his charms.

So after a few minutes, I sat him down on the living room floor and picked up a rag to wipe off his seat, bib, tray, and everything else he'd touched and left a sloppy mess. But I stopped short at the sight of a greenish pile of goo smeared on the seat of his chair. The second I realized he hadn't had anything remotely resembling this for breakfast, my heart stopped, as the identity of the mysterious began to sink in.

NOOOOooooo! I hollered, sprinting for the living room, where the carpet (which we had cleaned about 2 weeks ago) and the sofa were now sporting the same green smears.

To make a long, disgusting story a little shorter, I'll spare you the details and just say that I carried my little pooper to the bathroom and deposited him directly into the bathtub. It was the only thing to do. In the end, my sweatshirt an pants were covered and I found myself scrubbing poo from his back, legs, feet, arms and even his hair. I don't believe we've had a blowout this bad with any of the other kiddos, although they've had their share of doozies.

Anyway, about 45 minutes later, I had everything cleaned up and a load of laundry going, and was finally able to see the comedy of the situation. And I will say that for once, I had no desire to capture this moment with my camera.

I guess when it rains, it pours. Karis came up to Danny and me at our LIFE group cookout the other day, saying, "I had diarrhea in my panties." Sure enough . . . . she claimed she didn't feel it coming. Since she's been potty trained for over a year, I don't carry around extra clothes for her anymore. So, she had to be content wearing one of Malachi's diapers, which, interestingly, was a perfect fit.

It actually made me chuckle a little this morning, to think that this is part of my calling . . . for now! I guess one thing that can be said for this job is that it keeps you guessing - I never know what's going to happen next!

Scripture and Spankings

I've been praying (begging!) for wisdom a lot lately.

I've felt for some time that the discipline decisions we make with the kiddos - the way we handle both their actions and the heart attitudes that drive their actions, will have significant ramifications for their future and ours! But I have to admit, I've felt a little overwhelmed the past several months.

Danny and I just finished a class on this topic, through our church, during which we re-read Shepherding a Child's Heart. It's an excellent resource to help parents instruct their children in godliness by means of both good communication and the rod. Tedd Tripp, the author, encourages parents to take the time to deal with the sin issues in their children's hearts, not just the outward manifestation of those sins. It's really gotten me to stop and re-examine the way I parent my children, rather than just dish out the consequences because I'm fed up with the way they're behaving.

I'll be honest. This book made me feel like a loser. I never realized how many things I do wrong. I yell. I make excuses for them when we're in public ("They're tired - they haven't had their naps yet."). I'm inconsistent. I often wait to discipline them until I'm completely frustrated, rather than dealing calmly with it the first time it happens.

So this week, I finished another, similar book, by Ginger Plowman: "Don't Make Me Count to Three!" She says many of the same things as Ted Tripp, which once again made me feel overwhelmed and loser-y. But she lays out a couple of ground-breaking principles, which I have been trying to incorporate, and have made a HUGE difference in the way I've been parenting over the last several days.

She talks about the importance of laying out Scripture for your kids when they fight, disobey, etc., because Scripture is what will penetrate their hearts and bring repentance. What does the Bible say about their actions and heart attitudes? She also says it's important to provide a "way out" for them - to show them not just where they went wrong and what not to do, but also what they should / could be doing instead. To show them how to act righteously, and not just how to avoid acting foolishly. I've had a lot of talks lately with Zekers about losing his temper, instead of just excusing it by saying, "That's just Zekers." It comes down to self-control and is a sin that will take root in his heart unless Danny and I lovingly instruct Him in the ways of Christ.

It was also encouraging to read, once again, that using godly discipline doesn't change them overnight. I've often gotten discouraged after spending several days just giving spankings - and often for the same things, over and over again. In my opinion, this is the toughest part of parenting. I need reminders to hang in there and remain consistent.

The really cool thing about this, is it has forced me to study my Bible more!! I've spent some time looking for, and thinking of, Scriptures pertaining to certain behaviors such as lying, self-control, and loving others. I'm finding that throughout the day, verses come to mind just in conversation with them with non-discipline issues as well, and it gets easier the more you do it.

And we've been focusing a lot more on the desired attitudes and behaviors - what God expects of them. I can't say all of my discipline has been completely godly this week, but it's getting better. There have been small victories, where I've been able to deal with them calmly and Scripturally. And even though it's almost always a HUGE inconvenience to spend the time instructing them and making them practice the right way of doing things, it's been worth the time and effort. It's actually allowed me to enjoy them more and have some good conversations with them, although with Karis I'm still trying to get past the "I don't want a spanking, I don't want a spanking, I don't want a spanking . . . " broken record response each time.

So if you're behind me in the check-out line and you watch me totally lose it as they tear each other, and the shelves, apart - just be patient with me. I'm a work in progress, just like they are.

A Whole New World

Summer doesn't actually last 3 months. It pretty much ends in July when you wander into Wal-Mart to buy a few odds and ends and find that the school supply list for your daughter, who is entering first grade, is out and staring you in the face. At this point, you begin to hyperventilate as you launch into full-force planning mode for anything and everything starting up in September. I feel especially sorry for the folks at Hobby Lobby, as they start putting up pumpkins and cornucopias and fall paraphernalia in May!

I know a lot of you have been in this place - the place where you wonder how in the world your child ever became old enough to be in the first grade. I promise you, I was pregnant with her just a couple of years ago!

As the kiddos and I drove home from church today, Rachel said to me, "Mom, now that I can swim from the waterslide to the side of the pool without a lifeguard to catch me, I feel like I'm in a whole different world." I kind of laughed, because she says some of the funniest things and in a sort of honest, innocent way. "You're growing up fast," I replied. "You know," she said, "it's like there's a little kid world and a big kid world, and now I'm in the big kid world." "You are a big kid," I agreed, a bit ruefully.

I looked back at her, sitting in the booster seat that she doesn't quite weigh enough to sit in yet (she reached 39.5 lbs. last week!), and she was just glowing, reveling in her newly-discovered "big kid world."

But she's right. This summer she's developed a new confidence with so many things: reading, writing, swimming, helping with Malachi, and coolest of all, grasping biblical concepts and asking more in-depth questions.

We don't take many trips to the mall, since it's about an hour away; but when we do go, we make a day of it and do about 3 month's worth of shopping. We usually try to go around late January and late July, because I buy a lot of the kids' clothes off-season and everything is on clearance around those times. Usually when we go, I do all the shopping I can fit into 1-2 hours while Danny sits with the kids in the play area - it's a win-win!

Well, yesterday, for the first time, Rachel asked to go with me after lunch to do some shirt shopping, instead of playing with the others! And I couldn't believe how well she did: for 2 hours she traipsed through stores with me; picked out shirts for me to try on; went to the dressing room with me and gave me her opinion on each one (something she's always up for!); chatted it up with all the cashiers. And I realized my little girl isn't such a little girl anymore - she was more like a shopping buddy and less like someone I had to chase after and keep track of.

Anyway, Rachel won't turn 6 for another 3 weeks, but I wanted to write all this down before the moment passed (as it most likely will the next time she whines all morning or instigates a fight). But I'm so proud of her and most of the time, I really enjoy her crazy fun personality. I love you, Rachel Nicole!

And some miscellaneous pix from our week . . . .

On Tuesday we spent the afternoon with Katie, a beloved babysitter who moved away 3 years ago.
Wednesday we went to the last family day at the library; a gifted musician came and played/sang music with the kids.
Malachi and Viola, a little girl who spent the morning with us. In the background is the baby of another friend who came with her clan.
The kids entered a reading program through the library. They're supposed to read (or be read to) 20 minutes five times per week, and each week I entered their names for prizes. Well, the next to last week, Karis won a shirt that says, "Catch the reading bug" and Rachel won a "plush bug". The last week Zekers won a cool library card holder. They were all so proud of their prizes.