Monday, May 05, 2008

Six Weeks, Give or Take

Procrastination and I go way back. It was probably the worst in college, when I ended up pulling many an all-nighter to do a project handed out weeks in advance. (However, the chocolate-chip-cookie dough I consumed in the process made it all worthwhile.)

As each of my sweet babies has entered our family, procrastination has, by necessity, given way to (slightly) greater efficiency, as I've discovered that to preserve my sanity, I've needed to start planning ahead on occasion.

Except when it comes to certain medical appointments, apparently.

About 2 weeks ago, I called my OBGYN with a question. The nurse politely inquired, "Have you been in for your 6-week check-up?" I stammered and stuttered for a couple of seconds, and then out came just about the lamest reply I could have imagined giving: "Well. . . not yet. "I see", she said, and then asked, "And when was the baby born?"

Gulp. "October 3rd", came my guilty response.

LONG pause. "So it's been about . . . seven months?"

"Yeah, I guess I . . . forgot." The truth is, I really had forgotten for about the first 2 months, then put off calling for the next 2 months, and by then I reasoned, at this point, why bother?

Her voice took on the same tone I often use with my children. "Well, why don't we just set up an appointment, and when you come in you can talk to the doctor about all your questions."

Which is why I found myself, at 10:00 this morning, sitting in the OB's office filling out a bunch of forms about my last cycle and whether or not I have severe cramping or get excessively thirsty.

I was ushered into a tiny room to wait for the doctor. Now, here's what I just don't understand. They're always (at least in my experience) telling you to "just relax" all through this very unnatural procedure involving metal forceps and other rather large torture devices. So, to achieve this goal, they stick you in a tiny room where the temperature is just above the freezing point and tell you to remove all of your clothes. They give you a gown that feels as if another couple of washings just might disintegrate the thing, and a paper covering, and then . . . . they leave you alone with your thoughts. I'm not sure how long I sat in that little ice box of a room, trying unsuccessfully to huddle under a paper blanket about the size of a hand towel. But I believe this experience alone may have convinced me once and for all to stop having babies.

I should point out that I actually really like my OB and the nurse that assists him, and have known them both well for quite some time. So it didn't turn out too badly. It's the anticipation that kills me. (and the cold)

After that, the day got decidedly better. I picked up the kiddos from Grandma's house, and since Rachel was taking the bus to school with a friend, we didn't have to worry about rushing back home, so we all went to a local park and drank frappucinos. I let the kids drink about half of mine before I remembered it was full of caffeine. Needless to say, no one took a nap except Malachi.

All in all, not a bad day. Truth be told, I'd take a "6-week" appointment over a visit to the dentist any day.





15 comments:

Kati said...

Hey Charity, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but even AFTER you stop having babies, you're still supposed to do these appointments like once a year for THE REST OF YOUR LIFE!!

At my last appointment, you should have seen me (or maybe NOT) frantically scurrying around the little room, in ALL MY GLORY, digging through all the drawers trying to find another gown after I'd accidentally TORN IN TWO the little paper one they'd given me!! Talk about SHEER PANIC!!

Chris said...

Ok, how many of you do this....

After I am in my gown I go over to my clothes on the chair, fold them all neatly and hide my bra under something so it is not on top. Considering what the Dr. is about to do to me - don't you think it is silly??????

~~anna~~ said...

*ma*
You mean I'm NOT the only one who does this?
More & more thru the wonder of blogs, I am discovering how normal I really am.
thanks ladies~~

Jodi Bradshaw said...

Last time I went to the "doctor" (who happens to the be the same as Charity's) during my examination he said, "Good Job Jodi". Not sure if I got the relaxation thing down (which will never happen) or it is just because I had a baby. Needless, to say I burst out laughing!

Charity said...

LOL - you all are cracking me up! I have ALWAYS done the bra thing with the neatly-folded clothes. I figure, it's the one thing I can hide from him! I guess I should be glad I at least get to wear a cloth gown and not a paper one . ..

And now I can thumb my nose at you all because I won't have another appointment for 364 days. ha!

danny2 said...

uh, i had a comment (about our dentist being nice) i was going to leave...but feel very awkward like i just walked into a roaring room that immediately dropped to hush.

i'll leave you ladies to your other comments.

Anonymous said...

Or how about this...? I try to go around my birthday but didn't think I had last year. So, I called and the gal on the phone said I had not and come on in. When I was in and prepped, the doc came in, looked at chart, and said, we did this in September of '07. Want to get dressed? What a WASTE (of time and emotional energy!). mm

Margaret said...

oh man...i'm just laughing...i so do the folded clothes thing (all the while trying to keep a paper SHEET around me...no gown at my office, paper or no) but i go one farther...putting my panties in my purse! i have no idea why i do that?!

Here's the other thing you get to look forward to, Charity...mammograms every year...I hate those things!

Rod and Sara said...

Can I change the subject for a little?
Those pictures from the park are awesome, Charity!

Charity said...

I guess I should point out that I really like my dentist, too. I just hate having my teeth worked on more than anything in the world, for some reason.

And my only other comment is . . . if Jason Castro isn't voted off tonight, they need to remove voting privileges from girls under 15! :p

Anonymous said...

i've successfully avoided all "those" appointments and mammograms for the past 11 years. since that isn't wise advice, i'm not giving it, but i AM saying that i don't miss the stress they cause.

PS - it took me 4 years to make my "6-week" appointment after Cami....

Anonymous said...

I'm so disappointed, I actually got excited reading your blog thinking you were going to announce #5 was on the way--bummer!!

Charity said...

NOOOOOoooooo!

shoemama said...

YOu all are freaks! You really fold your clothes? when you're just going to put them back on in 2 mintues? i do hide the undergarments, but fold the clothes???
Anywho, yes, that is something I dread about being pregnant, you have the initial "checkup" to make sure you're pregnant, then when you get to like 36 weeks or something, they happen every week! And if you're like me, you go to after 41 weeks (so that means 5 more "checks")! At least when you're not having babies, you only have those things once a year. And I still have about 300 days till my next one!

Anonymous said...

Unless you get pregnant first!!! Shoemama's mama